Saturday, September 19, 2009

"...that one awesome thing that can change the world"

My busy life since the past several months has almost taken away the fact that I used to have a blog to maintain. I still remember the times back in late 2007 and almost all of 2008 when this blog used to be a way to vent my primary line of thought - probably as a get away from the complexities of life, its thoughts, emotions and other associated processes :). Life has taken several interesting turns ever since, especially this year, that I realize as I look back; and things which weren't too apparent when they were taking place :).

One of those myriad happenings is that I have begun to get a taste of my PhD thesis! It's amazingly interesting to see how an assimilated collection of several problems can actually tackle multiple dimensions of a larger research goal. Things before, during and after my internship at Yahoo! Research have also mostly been red and rosy; amidst incredible hard work all summer and some exciting fun times with sumptuous food in and around New York City. People around are now asking and telling me about graduating in or around the next one year, but I don't think I am ready for that yet.

This brings up the more philosophical question - when do you really think you have a PhD thesis? When is it that you think you are "done" and ready to get out and fight the larger arena of some exciting research? When are you placated by your own work? Of course I am not talking of the thousands of contextual circumstances that might hurry your graduation - for example, advisor's suggestion, shortage of funds, availability of a job you like, getting settled with your significant other, desire to move to some place for "other" reasons and so on. I am talking when do you think it comes from your very inside that you are ready to graduate?

I don't have an answer and I am looking for one. However since day one of my PhD I knew there was one reason I was doing all this, going through all the social ordeal, going against what friends are doing with their lives or even leading an extremely unusual life. And that reason was the desire to make a difference to the world in general and the research area in particular. I think the day I feel I have accomplished "that one awesome thing that can change the world", I think it'll spring from my inside that I am ready to graduate; ready to take on the crusade towards another even tougher, even more exciting than ever journey in the sands of space and time! :)